Oh man. Welcome back buddy.
I have figured out what the internet is. You know what they say about an infinite number of monkeys hitting keys at random on an infinite number of typewriters for an infinite amount of time? Well the internet is like that. There is some big cosmic alien running that experiment here in order to find the answer to some big question or to create the greatest piece of literature known to the universe. From what I have seen so far I am sorry to say they are going to be greatly disappointed.